One of you guys asked me how to find an Erotic Massage Parlor. Well, the easiest way to start is to pick up the Yellow Pages. Go ahead, I’ll wait. Hummmmmmm…hummmmmm…hummmmmmmm… Ok? Got it? Now open it up to the “M’s and look for “Massage” (If you get to “Massage Therapists” – go back... you went too far). Wasn’t that easy? Go look at the listings. Anything that has the words Parlor, Sauna, or Acupressure in the title – BINGO - it’s a massage parlor! Also, if a listing sounds vaguely asian, exotic, or risqué, it’s probably a massage parlor. For example: Oriental Star, Maximus, or Pleasureland are all probably massage parlors.
By the same token, any ad with the words: LMT, Therapeutic, or Hair and Nails, is NOT NOT NOT a massage parlor!!!! Having begun my career in a legitimate salon, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen guys make this embarrassing mistake.
Other key words to look for in the ads are: Table Shower, Body Shampoo, and Stress Relief. Also look at the hours – Massage Parlors will usually have weird, late hours.
Before I proceed, let me make a disclaimer here… I am NOT advocating any illegal activity on your part. I am just providing some general information that you can use at your own risk. I take no responsibility for whatever you guys get into.
Now that THAT’S out of the way… you probably want to know how to identify a place that’s full service or happy ending only. This one is tougher, but I’ll try to share with you what I know. Any ads that say: Now Hiring, Incall, or Outcall are probably Full Service. Please don’t ask why “Now Hiring” is a code word cuz I don’t know! Now with that said, I can’t tell you any code words to identify a Hand Job Only place. You can try the internet for some chat rooms or something to see if anyone knows anything about your local places. In general, the more legitimate a place appears to be, the more likely it’s HJ only. Or they can be a mix. For example, I’ve worked at places where I was the “Go To Girl” for HJ’s and Therapeutic massages (or suspected Narcs). Since I have my license, I would be the 1 girl they could trot out when things had to appear legit. Know what I mean?
Well guys, this should be more than enough info to get you through the door – the rest is up to you. And remember – we work for tips, so please be generous. If you come in with a good attitude and know what to expect, we’ll both have a good time. Relax! It’s all about having fun!
See ya this weekend!
CJ
Showing posts with label Acupressure. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Acupressure. Show all posts
Monday, March 10, 2008
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Asian Massage Parlors
I finally got my first question the other day - it’s about time you guys started asking me stuff since I really don’t even know where to begin. So you wanna know about the Asian places, huh? Well that reminds me about what my co-worker Katy and I were talking about last night.
In our area of the state, we get a weekly rag called the Weekender. You’ve probably seen them – they’re given away free in grocery stores and gas stations. Mostly they cover local concerts, politics, movies etc. But if you look in the back pages, you’ll find all sorts of ads for strip clubs, massage parlors, and in some cities escort agencies. Periodically we scan the ads to see how the local competition is doing or if there’s a new shop in town.
There are always ads for the local Asian places. They usually go by the name of “Sauna,” “Spa” or “Accupressure.” Tip for you guys – any place that says accu-pressure is a code word for massage parlor. On the flip side – if you go to any place that says accu-puncture – don’t bother asking the 70 year old Chinese guy who works there for a happy ending.
The Asian places differ from other massage parlors in only a couple ways. First – they usually offer a “Table Shower” or “Body Shampoo.” This is where they lay you on a table in a giant shower stall, and scrub you from head to toe. Then they sometimes stick you in a sauna for a few minutes before taking you to the massage room. Keep in mind that all this pampering is taken out of your 60 minute session. What I hear from my customers is that the massage rooms always look like seedy little bedrooms instead of legit businesses with real massage tables. I have also heard from my customers that most of them are full service. Occasionally you’ll find one that’s happy ending only, but you can’t tell the difference from just looking through the window.
One way to find out if a massage business is full service is to have a female call them and ask for an appointment (or ask for your “wife”). They will make some lame excuse why they’re not taking appointments if they are full service. Happy-Ending-Only places may take the appointment if they need to appear legit. Sometimes we like to screw with the Asian places by calling them and trying to make appointments. We’ll keep insisting on coming in till they hang up on us.
Keep those questions coming!! Bye for now.
CJ
In our area of the state, we get a weekly rag called the Weekender. You’ve probably seen them – they’re given away free in grocery stores and gas stations. Mostly they cover local concerts, politics, movies etc. But if you look in the back pages, you’ll find all sorts of ads for strip clubs, massage parlors, and in some cities escort agencies. Periodically we scan the ads to see how the local competition is doing or if there’s a new shop in town.
There are always ads for the local Asian places. They usually go by the name of “Sauna,” “Spa” or “Accupressure.” Tip for you guys – any place that says accu-pressure is a code word for massage parlor. On the flip side – if you go to any place that says accu-puncture – don’t bother asking the 70 year old Chinese guy who works there for a happy ending.
The Asian places differ from other massage parlors in only a couple ways. First – they usually offer a “Table Shower” or “Body Shampoo.” This is where they lay you on a table in a giant shower stall, and scrub you from head to toe. Then they sometimes stick you in a sauna for a few minutes before taking you to the massage room. Keep in mind that all this pampering is taken out of your 60 minute session. What I hear from my customers is that the massage rooms always look like seedy little bedrooms instead of legit businesses with real massage tables. I have also heard from my customers that most of them are full service. Occasionally you’ll find one that’s happy ending only, but you can’t tell the difference from just looking through the window.
One way to find out if a massage business is full service is to have a female call them and ask for an appointment (or ask for your “wife”). They will make some lame excuse why they’re not taking appointments if they are full service. Happy-Ending-Only places may take the appointment if they need to appear legit. Sometimes we like to screw with the Asian places by calling them and trying to make appointments. We’ll keep insisting on coming in till they hang up on us.
Keep those questions coming!! Bye for now.
CJ
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