Thursday, July 7, 2011

Going Legit

This is a lot harder than I thought. I mean, it's not like I get an uncontrollable urge to grab some strange man and give him a handjob in the middle of a grocery store. But I do miss having a steady job and somewhere to be 40 hours a week.

It's been about 2 weeks now since I walked out of The Business. I've had Regulars calling me and I still won't pick up the phone. Part of it is I just don't want to talk about what happened, and part of it is not wanting anything to do with that part of my life anymore. But there were a couple guys I talked to, just to let them know I wasn't going to be around. For the most part, everyone has been understanding and supportive, but it was only a matter of time before guys started asking me about outcall.

I've been asked to meet guys in hotel rooms before, but I guess people think I'll be desperate enough to do it now that I'm "independent." I mean what the fuck? I just want to lay low for a while and figure out what I really want to do with my life.

And in the meanwhile I only want a couple of my mom's friends as clients. Little old ladies don't pay much, but at least they won't try to finger me or cum in my hair.

CJ


34 comments:

Anonymous said...

what ever makes you feel better...hope all turns out good for you

shallby

Anonymous said...

Best of luck in whatever you decide, it's a tough decision but I'm sure you'll make the right one. Do you think it is time to write a book? You have a real talent for telling interesting stories, although I would miss reading your blog.

BBobJ

Bruno Alaska said...

Hi, CJ. I just started following your blog, although I haven't read all of your posts, I like what I have read so far and I am looking forward to reading other posts. I wish you the best of luck in your future, and keep your head up, it'll get better.

Reflex said...

CJ - Congrats, I'm glad your thinking about your future seriously. I asked before what it would take you to consider giving it up, at the time you said nothing could, but now you have had a change of heart. Honestly its for the best, you are *way* too smart for this.

Before you think I'm dissing the job, just look back at your co-workers. Seriously. You are way smarter than all of them. Why the hell are you doing the same thing and making the same money as people who aren't half as bright? Hell, your brighter than the owner. You should NOT be aspiring to be her, you could be so much more, regardless of what your future career is.

Good luck. This is a good thing. Even though its difficult right now.

Anonymous said...

write a book and sell it (kindle or similar format)
you'll clean up

Tyler said...

CJ; I'm with anonymous up there. You're an excellent writer (the reason I've been following your blog for almost 2 years), who has a talent for taking almost absurd situations and making them both believable and funny. You really should write a book or two; expand on your blog posts, dish more dirt on the "freak of the week" types. I can almost guarantee that it'd sell; even self-published (easy nowadays to self-pub e-books and print-on-demand), you'd probably do well.

Best of luck now that you're legit; I think all your readers will miss the salacious details of the massage parlor, but you sound like you're happier about things in general now, which is good!

MelissaBlade said...

Good luck C.J. I agree with everyone else that you should turn to writing. You are truly talented!

It must be difficult to give up the money though.

When will you give the details of what actually happened??

Jared-Canada said...

Someone sounds pregnant...

Lots of sex with boyfriend.
Sudden need to change life drastically.
Boyfriend suddenly proposing in order to try to cheer you up.

Fits the pattern pretty well.

Anonymous said...

Life is hard to live when you are basing everything off of an illusion. I know what you will do tho "CJ" heh...you will try to restrain and tame yourself so that an ordinary existence is possible...add some order to the chaos and "Derek" will not know any different. You will feel placated by the environment you manipulate to contain this illusion but youll always know that you are as much a liar as you are a lover. Internally and externally...

Whatever shook your reality I am sorry it happened, truly am...but you have been begging for the karma and change long enough. No matter how you frame it you have been perpetuating a life of manipulation and ego boosting...such is why this blog is in existence. If they only knew the extent to the twist in your story...they believe what you tell them tho, as if it were the gospel...and isn't that what you need, people to care about what you are doing and admiring you for "who you are"...? Give you support and validation for your way of being?

...child of a chaotic family of abuse and drinking...you seem too resilient and outspoken to stand for sexual abuse etc but im sure youve had your brushes with it. Youve been objectified by men and use their wants for your means. Most obviously you like to micromanage the world around you to insure you dont feel loosely bound emotionally or insecure in the truest moments in life. I would even bet a string of loosely bound relationships that you could never Fully commit to emotionally and physically as a result of hiding the dark passenger in you that needs to be seen as a sex idol, a goddess of sexuality to be worshiped, dominated and gently owned...and im sure the guys who you were honest with probably went running for the hills and the ones that didn't you probably sabotaged.

Good luck making a name for yourself as a former parlor girl...or perhaps give the 'tools' of how to manipulate and understand your prey in relationships/sex...or some predatory view of the sort. Shed the skin and pretend you are somebody from a story that doesn't exist?...this blog is a good jump start...remember as you speak your story you can always omit the parts you regret, but youll never forget...

Could he ever know the Whole truth and still love you? I'm pretty sure he doesn't exist, that and its obvious you are too girly and gotti to drive a truck and have blonde hair...you probably despise dumb trashy blondes and in some way hate what you do so you connected the two to this fake image/reflection of your life and "job"...interesting thought no?...

You would have told him if you thought there was a chance, instead you lie...Goodluck, spill the details and Dereks "true love" will try to stick around for a crazy washed up "20's something" hand whore, i'm sure of it...or live a lie. Your choice. How good are you at seducing men in real life, enough that you could be the honest you without immediate rejection?
Its obvious you fear this...

my first and only comment to you young beautiful talented and seductive "CJ"
may the wind be at your back and lifting up your skirt
lol

Anonymous said...

Dear CJ,

I would hope that your Mom will be able to watch the new baby whilst you find another job polishing knobs.

I have a hard time believing you would make a very good mother although you are an entertaining read.

Respectfully,
Married Man

Mistress Suzie Snow said...

CJ,
Good to know so many people agree with my idea of pursuing a book, and the masses are not wrong. I believe it would help you close out that chapter in your life. FYI- you can keep your anonymity as "belle de jour" did until she chose to do otherwise! Look at her success- A HIT TV show ( Secret diary of a call girl), series of books & oh yes.. It all started with a blog. I can name quite a few other successful bloggers who parlayed their part time joy of blogging into a full time career.

Glad to hear you put in place boundaries. It is important to decide what you will and will not do in any job situation & stick to it! If you know you don't want ANY part of erotic massage, don't compromise... like you said some people will think you are hard up and think they are in luck!
Just a thought also, as money may be tight.. Make some business cards, take them to hotels closest to the airport that do not have a spa. You will get a variety of people, but mostly business men looking to unwind. They likely will be willing to pay extra to have personal service and not have to leave their room. I am a licenced cosmetologist and do hair and waxing in a similar fashion.

I am sure you have tons of offers, but if you would like to chat, I would love to.

Suzie

Anonymous said...

Hey CJ,

Hang in there. Take some time and find your way. You can do it.

Love the blog and pursuing your writing aspirations into another level would be cool too.

Good luck.

Jason

Anonymous said...

Wellp, I shall join the large ranks of the Anonymii and comment for the first time.

I've read your blog for a long time, as a fairly dull young lady, just because I was pretty fascinated by the ins and out (or rather, the ups and downs) of your line of business, and as many others have said, you commented on them with wit and panache.

Whatever happened that caused you to quit: I hope you do what YOU want to do from now on. Ignore us, because we're biased and want to read more blog. You do what you want with life, but do tell us what decisions you reach (or wrestle with), and what happened before you advance into the sunset, aye?

Oh, and lastly: it was your job, and you're not half the things that less pleasant members of the blog have made you out to be. Only you know you, but you seem like the sort of person who I'd have a good titter with over coffee. You have my respect.

tightend said...

Hi CJ,

I echo the sentiments that you should write a book.

However, are you going to share with us the breaking point that made you leave the business?

Tightend

Little Red said...

You really are a fantastic writer, I'd be entertained by anything you chose to write about. Good luck CJ, in whatever you decide to do.
-Red

Anonymous said...

Little Red!!

Your former readers want to know what you are up to as well!!

Reflex said...

Hey Little Red, good to know you still exist! Hope your doing better now. All the best to you and CJ.

And ignore the lunatics, I have no idea whats up with that.

Shannon Rae said...

COMPILE THE BLOG AND WRITE A BOOK.

I still can't believe you left. Are you going to ever tell us all what happened?

Shannon Rae said...

buncha weirdo Anons today....really creepy ones.

Phil said...

You know, even though you quit the business, I have a feeling you can still write a pretty interesting blog, and I hope you continue to do so. Although in your job you had regulars that will miss your work, we'll miss you here too. Hope you keep writing. It wasn't what you wrote about that we like, it's how you write, the personality you put into it. And don't be so sure that your mother's friends won't try any of those things. : )

Anonymous said...

You all assume she is pregnant but let me tell you something. I have been in this business long enough to know that women don't quit when they're pregnant. They just work even harder. They don't tell anyone until about 7 months and then they start advertising for the pregnancy fetish. Believe me, lots of men love pregnant women. I see them on usg forum saying "Oh she's so glowing!" etc. Some of them try to find a sugar daddy when they are getting close to having the baby. Then they are right back at it shortly after they have their baby. Working hard to provide their child with lots of money for the things they need. I wish there was a "like" button on this forum for Reflex's comments :)

Anonymous said...

Must suck realizing you are nothing kore than a prostitute

Anonymous said...

another vote for a book.

I'd buy.

Mark said...

People can be so negitive and looney, it must be so easy hiding behind the little "Anon" name.

Your blog is such a great read, and I, and along with all the other well wishers, hope you do well in your new job search. Legit or not, your life, your choice, and we hope to be kept posted =D

And hey, I'm sure there are still tons of untold stories that could be dug up during this time to tide us over during your transition... and worse comes to worse, hearing about the news you find within the community about the business's is never a bad thing.

Best of luck in your future job searches! =D

Anonymous said...

CJ, if you want to make a change, then go for it. The important thing is for you to be happy.

Best wishes to you, Babe...

Anonymous said...

Hey Cj,
Long time reader, first time poster. Its been a lot of fun watching your blog develop over the years. I'm rooting for you at this intersection in your life and excited to hear what you choose to do. You seems to have the writing skil to actually pull off a book or two. I'm not sure how much money is to be made with that, but you can count me as a buyer.

Whatever you decide to do, I hope you will keep us informed as you work on that decision. You know we all visit your blog not to judge, but to take a break from our day and learn something about you or hear an interesting story.

Best wishes,
J

Anonymous said...

Ditto...What 'J' said. I couldn't have said it better myself.

Good luck!!!

Anonymous said...

CJ

have you thought of going to college for a year?

Anonymous said...

Did you ever fart on a client. Fart on them so powerful the massage table broke. It's a fartssage.

Alektra Land said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Best of luck to you in whatever your new endeavor will be.

I stumbled onto this blog yesterday (Happy Endings--with a z?) I ended up reading from oldest post to newest. You have a talent for writing. No matter what your day job ends up, keep working on a manuscript.

Anonymous said...

question: do you still check your comments or your email? sent you an email the other day.

Tom Moran said...

It's difficult to leave a part of your life behind and start a new chapter, but it can be done. And sometimes you feel a lot better once you've moved on. But the transition can be difficult and painful. Here's hoping that you move on to whatever future you want to create for yourself, and that you enjoy the next job as much or more than the last one. I'm rooting for you.

Being_Positive said...

Though I'm sure the clients are disappointed, just do what you know/feel is right.