Friday, January 18, 2013


Is the worse thing ever.  

That and discovering on Facebook that your ex-boyfriend is now engaged.  Yeah - I had to learn it on fucking Facebook that Derek is engaged.  I mean what the fuck?  We only broke up like a year ago and he's already engaged to someone.

So I've been kind of out of it over the last couple of months.  I came down with bronchitis back in November and it knocked me out for 2 months.  I was out of work for about 3 weeks.  Then when I finally went back, it was just to sit at the desk for another couple of weeks.  

The thing about coughing uncontrollably and spitting up green shit is that it kinda turns off customers.  Funny thing about The Business - coughing turns off guys while sneezing turns them on.  Go figure.  I've actually had guys tip extra after I've gone into a sneezing fit.  

What have you missed?  Well, I had to fire Kimmie.  Turns out she was blowing guys in the room.  An ex-escort goes back to her old habits?  Shocking, I know.  At The Business we can get naked and jerk you off, but Gawd forbid you wrap your mouth around them until they cum.

Am I being cynical?  You betcha.  That's one of the reasons why I dropped off the map for so long.  I had nothing to say.  When you find out your ex is now marrying a fucking engineering graduate from Drexel, talking about a guy who wants to lick his own cum off your tits seems a bit weak.  

So there you have it.  I'm back.  Not 100%, but at least I feel like blabbing about it.  



Advizor54 said...

There are ups and downs in every career. My friend helped land the Mars rover, ON MARS!!! So when we talk about work and I'm all hot-fired about a "cool" Excel spreadsheet, I just keep my mouth closed.

Welcome back. Cynicism and all, we've missed you (and by we, i'm talking about all the voices in my head. Franky missed you the most, but he's in a time-out right now) :-)

Anonymous said...

I called my girl to meet for lunch one day, and she said it probably wasn't a good idea. Why? Because she had married someone the day before.

That was twenty years ago. Or yesterday. I get confused.

Not trying to top your scene. Comparisons are odious. Just made me remember.

JustJoe said...


I can lie and say things will get better, but whats the point in that?

How about welcome back, aside from nasty lung-butter I hope you had a good holiday season.

"between 40% and 60% of new marriages will eventually end in divorce."
-Brian K. Williams, Stacy C. Sawyer, Carl M. Wahlstrom, Marriages, Families & Intimate Relationships, 2005

Dario Rosselini said...

Dear CJ,

I've been really worried about you during the past 3 months. Worried that something bad had happened to you. Well, bronchitis is bad, but not as bad as I feared.
You fired Kimmie? I thought Britney was the ex-escort.
Anyway, I hope you'll get well soon

Anonymous said...

I know you're feeling crappy. but it's good to have ye back lass.

Shannon Rae said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Welcome Back...I for one, am glad you are back. Sorry to hear about the latest drama but I am confident you will come out on always do.

Anonymous said...

Glad it's only bronchitis. I thought you got 90 days for something.

Kiley Lovecraft said...

I am really happy you are back!! I was worried that something had happened, not that bronchitis isn't something, but at least it is get-overable.

As far as Derek is concerned, he is get-overable too. Stop worrying about who is marrying who, live your life the way you want, and the right guy will find you.

Can we have trashy talk now? Please?!?


Anonymous said...

Perhaps he appreciates the honesty his fiancé brings to the relationship and was better able to open up to her emotionally? If you really were ok with what you do, you'd be honest about it in your relationships, and actually have a shot in hell of finding someone who loves you unconditionally and isn't resentful that you hide a huge part of your life from him. Just saying. Welcome back, btw.

Daryl Halfdan Petersen Jr. said...

Welcome Back. Found your blog a month ago and have been wondering what happened to you. Your writing is pretty good and really enjoy it. Funny it actually inspired me to get my first ever massage, therapeutic that is\, still to nervous to get one with a happy ending, lol.

Anonymous said...

It is always darkest before the dawn. I had a very rough patch in the recent past and then one day everything unexpectedly started improving. Your wit is priceless. It makes me laugh and learn about a world very different than I am used to.
Good luck.

Anonymous said...

"between 40% and 60% of new marriages will eventually end in divorce."
-Brian K. Williams, Stacy C. Sawyer, Carl M. Wahlstrom, Marriages, Families & Intimate Relationships, 2005

And the rest of them end in death.

Good to have you back!! ;o)

Anonymous said...

I know where you're at, CJ. I've been there. Keep your chin up.

Anonymous said...

Missed your posts - glad you are ok. Great to have you back!

Anonymous said...

CJ - Glad to see that you are ok... missed you!

Goodluck with the business!

Eddie Biggins said...

Missed you. Welcome back.

Anonymous said...

CJ I'm so glad you returned. I partake of this hobby more than I'd like but mn like me are lucky there are women like you in this world.
We all benefit when we can laugh at ourselves and you provide lots of quality laughs embedded in your very readable blog posts.
Here's hoping you are back to your regular schedule.
BTW My ATF masseuse loves it when I read your posts to her when we meet at her MP, true story

Scott said...

Glad to have you back girl, sorry for the illness and drama. Now my life has meaning again ;-)

Anonymous said...

First of all, I'm glad to hear you're alive. For a second I thought your coked up stalker may have returned.

Now, I have a few questions if you don't mind.

Have you ever had a guy with an inverted penis (a penis that "retreats" into the fat pouch when flaccid. They sort of look like buttons)?

Ever had a guy that was just too hairy to deal with?

Oldest customer? Youngest?

Dan said...

Glad you are back. Must have checked your blog 30 times. You are learning a lot; about life and love and The playing and watching guys playing, paying around the edge of it. I have respect for what you do. And yet, you are a heart woman, thus the Derek thing knocked you out. I think we all want to end up Somewhere. Being on the road is great--you show us what we can learn there--but Landing Home is great too, and ideal actually. Keep believing. Your are on the road now with love and sex and all. You'll land someday; but you'll teach us a lot on the way. You are a beautiful person, CJ.

Shannon Rae said...

Welcome back CJ! Just so happy to hear about what's going on with you lately; sorry about the Derek and the bronchitis. 2013 will be great for you, I can feel it!

Anonymous said...

Feel better ma'am! :)

Anonymous said...


I start as a new girl on Friday, and am extremely nervous. Or at least, I was until I sat down and read every post on this blog. Thank you for calming my nerves, and I hope I can do as great of a job as you seem to do.

Also, can you perhaps make a "guide" or "checklist" or something for new girls? Perhaps certain key phrases or terms to use, to keep you safe and legal. What to wear, what to bring, how to act on your first day.. How to explain prices, extras and options without specifically saying that ___ costs $$$ (Voluntary donations? Recommended gratuity?)

I don't want to do anything wrong, or upset the other working girls, and most importantly I can't upset "Billy". "Billy" seems to have high expectations, but I can't blame him for doing his job.

Anonymous said...

CJ, question for you. I know your feelings about AMTs, but it seems that all 15 spas in my city are Asian, about half are legit. Do all Asian spas fall into the same category? The same seems to be true with surrounding cities. In addition, I found one lady in a legit spa who is really great that I have seen about six times now, any chance for a HE sometime in the future? Thanks, and glad to see you are back.

Kelly said...

Bronchitis is awful. I feel for you. I've had it and the flu for three weeks now. The CDC said that this is the worst flu epidemic they have seen for a decade now.

Hope you start feeling better... about everything.

Anonymous said...

You mentioned a few blogs back that Brittney was the escort, not Kimmie???

I'm smelling bullshit with this blog.

Massage Services said...

Good and nice post.

Alexa Salinger said...

How did you find out what Kimmie was doing?

I used to work at a spa and they completely overlooked that stuff.

Doug said...

My wife is a 28 year old Asian American woman living in New York City. A former stripper. She wants to work in a massage parlor giving hand only happy endings. What advice do you have for her to find employment? Thanks.

Micheal said...

I thought you are in jail. I am glad I guessed wrong. Also, I thought you are still with Derik. I didn't know you broke up with him a year ago though.

But, what do you expect? The bottomline of a relationship is honesty. I would want to know what my girlfriend were doing for living, if I at least care about her.

CJ, your life is yours, and I respect whatever you do. But, don't be a hypocrite! If you are okay with your job, come out to your friends and family for God's sake! If you are not okay, why don't you go to Drexel University, and spend 4 years, and find a legitimate job?

I have known college students with full time jobs. You would be able to do the same thing! Study in the day, work in the night.

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