Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Baby it's cold outside

Fucking coldest night in history and we still had customers.  Go home and hide under a blanket for Gawd's sake!   That's what I'm doing.  At work we had electric heaters in each room and out front because even with the thermostat cranked up, it wasn't keeping us warm.  Just another work hazard when your job description includes the word "topless."

Well, it's been a year since I bothered to sit down and document my miserable life.  But it's only been a month since Derek got married.  What have I been up to all this time?  Well, in a nutshell I've been more or less keeping "The Business" from going out of business.  I've hired and fired I don't know how many girls.  And I've been hooking up only with guys who won't call me the next morning. 

In other words, things are back to normal.  I think I waited so long to write anything here because I had nothing to say.  I've been on autopilot for so long I forgot that there's more to life than just handjobs.  Shit, my life was one giant handjob.

Up. Down.  Repeat.

It's been so long I don't even know where to begin.  So I'll leave it up to you guys to try to get me back in the game.  Go ahead - ask whatever you want.  Make me laugh. Cheer me up.  Try to coax me out of my shell.

CJ

37 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey CJ, glad you are back. Hope to hear some new stories.

Anonymous said...

I often find it a lot more difficult to "rise to the occasion" in a cold massage room. Does the cold make you work a lot harder?

Anonymous said...

Too cold? Two words: Erect nipples.

Anonymous said...

I'm playing catch up here ....reading all the blog posts since 2008. It's like reading a best seller. Anyway Happy New Year! I've never gotten a massage with a happy ending, pretty much thought it was a myth a something that happens to other guys but I also have only went to spots that were pretty much not into that, but who knows what happens behind closed doors after reading your blogs. My question is ..without anything being said if I'm naked and have a full on wood showing when I turn over ...doesn't that pretty much begin the conversation if there is going to be any HJ, BJ or FS? Or does that mean absolutely nothing? Also, I've never taken my underwear off ...on purpose..but I'm going to try it soon and turn over with wood and see what happens...no expectations.

Anonymous said...

So happy to see a new post here. Thought this feed was dead. I hope 2014 is an awesome year for you, CJ, and that you find some hilarious topics to blog about soon.

Shey said...

Hi CJ, welcome back!! We all really missed you! I'm excited to hear some more stories...I'm sure you've had experiences in the last year where you thought you wanted to blog about them but then got too lazy or distracted?? Start with those!

Jennifer said...

Yay you're back! Missed your writing and the crazy stories.

Anonymous said...

In some ways the economy has rebounded, and in others it still stinks. How has business's business been in the past six months?

Anonymous said...

So glad to hear from you!!! Derek got married? Whoa. I wanna know on average how many girls you hired per week, how long they lasted, and any particularly memorable newbie oopsies there were, if any. If you're keeping the business going, is Maud still pulling her weight?

John Smith said...

Hey glad to see your back. Missed you bunches you use to do freak of the week now we could we get freak of the YEAR!!!

Anonymous said...

It must be tough to open up, but thanks for your blog and hopefully this year will be a breakout year for you.

Dave Lawrence said...

Okay, I'll bite. Why "hooking up only with guys who won't call me the next morning"? Is this a conscious decision you're making because of the old "guys can't handle dating a woman who does what I do" reason, or is it just the kind of guy you keep ending up with even though you'd like something more?

Anonymous said...

CJ, been faithfully watching for your return and so glad you did. All the best in 2014. Just tell us of an event or adventure every few days. In a strange way we are connected to your life and your success - whatever form that takes.

Anonymous said...

So glad you are back :)
Look how many folks have been checking, it's because we, and me for sure, like the way you don't take life or yourself too seriously . I'd also say we like you too.
So give us the freak of the year update, it might just be up/down/ repeat to you, but we love the way you describe it, and all the other silliness at the Business
Please post more than once in 2014, a lot more, please

Anonymous said...

Does anyone know the name of the shop where CJ works? I would like her to be my first experience.

Penis Johnson said...

Did you get arrested in 2013? what is your new years resolution?

The Coroner's Boner said...

CJ, it's so good to see you back on the blog! You're the best. :-) C'mon... tell us some funny/sexy stories. I know you have some new ones. Love ya!

The Coroner's Boner said...

By the way, I agree with "anonymous 1/9/14, 2:52 AM". You sound sexy as hell, and fun to hang with.

As for your hooking up with dudes who won't call you the next day, you're short-changing yourself. Trust me, there are guys out there who can curl your toes that you would still like with our clothes on. (Unfortunately, some of us live in the Midwest.)

C'mon, gorgeous. Let's see those beautiful tits, and talk dirty to us. You know you love it, and we do too.

Anonymous said...

CJ- MT who's bio states"relaxation is at hand" prob good to go with HE?

Anonymous said...

CJ, good to see you're still at it. I don't doubt that the "business" can be a drain on you especially hiring girls who can conform to the rules. You are a smart, strong woman. Stay safe, make the money and keep your head up!

Anonymous said...

I've been reading and re-reading your blogs for a while now, and I still enjoy them.

It's like watching funny reruns; I know what's going to happen and I still continue to watch. Up, down, repeat!

Not that I can really make a comparison between you in a session and me watching the office , but we both know how they end.

I've never had a professional massage, erotic or otherwise, but if I ever get one I know to say that I've been there before. Gawd knows I could use one, since I'm still not over the Birds blowing that game...I'm upsetting myself just thinking about it.

Anyway, I'm sure there's a guy out there who will be dying to call you the next day, but Swingers taught them to make you wait.

Keep your fucking head up, you're great!

khancock said...

Hey there! I just wanted to say I have really enjoyed reading your blog. I have a few questions though, how does one find a good masseuse? Have you ever been or had a relationship with a client? How often do you get turned on while you work? Have you ever worked with a couple? Just curious..Thanks! Stay Warm!

Anonymous said...

Great to see you back CJ, was beginning to think that was the world's worst case of bronchitis evar! :) Plus life is like a handjob, the key is to give it the odd twist to keep it interesting here and there.
You could do a few top 10 lists of the past year to catch up. Top 10 most compromising situations you've found others in. Top 10 best nicknames for customers. And so on

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you're back. I was worried you got pinched.

convinced actually.

I'm sure it doesn't mean to much coming from an anonymous poster.

but I'm glad you're back.
I really am.

Anonymous said...

What percentage of the girls working at erotic massage parlors started out being trafficked? I have been reading a lot of posts from "Johns" who describe the girls as working of "immigration debts", as a type of indentured servitude. You also discussed the lack of enforcement in earlier posts. If these girls were "hypothetically" being trafficked into the country, how would you suggest law enforcement to catch and penalize them? P.S. I am not LEO.

Anonymous said...

Glad to see you back CJ! Been worried something had happened, and occasionally checked just hoping to see a brief note like this to know you're ok. Hope you have a better 2014!

Anonymous said...

Actually since your departure was closely timed to the arrival of the hurricane that clobbered the east coast I wondered if you were swept away either literally or figuratively. I'm happy to see your back and hope you can share with us more of your life.

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy to read your stuff, I'm leaving wet spots all over the carpet. But I'm old so I can get away with that.

Glad you're back.

Anonymous said...

So glad your back you must have some freak of the weeks you can share!..I have to admit I am a Happy Ending massage lover have been going for ever I always hope I am not someone ones freak of the week story.
I actually am Canadian and see one Gil you used to email with here in Canada. Please keep posting!!!

Kincora said...

A) Glad I never deleted your link in my favorites.

B) Also glad the year long absence wasn't enforcement related.

C) Please continue to regale us with your stories. We do find them information.

JG said...

Let me echo the others in saying that I'm so happy to see you back and hear that nothing bad happened to you. I pretty much discovered your blog right about the time you "got bronchitis" and thought I just had the worst luck ever! so entertaining AND informative! loved learning everything you had to tell us, AND in the process getting to know YOU.
sorry life doesn't feel like its going anywhere right now. it never seems this way, but everybody goes through those periods of their life. They are temporary. Best way to pull yourself out is to focus on a long-term goal and try to make progress. Any closer to living the dream of opening that tanning salon?
As for what to tell us about, I think you can probably tell that we'd all gobble up anything you have to give us, but since you asked for inspiration, what's new with all the old characters we used to know (Trina and the gang, you know. Cindy, etc.) Maybe its easier to start talking about other people's lives if yours doesn't seem worth writing about at the moment. once again, welcome back. please don't leave us hanging again, I'm not sure we could take it! some of us truly care about you.

Anonymous said...

Aw CJ we missed you. You should be finding the guys who will take you to dinner and not sleep over the first night :(

Love you!

Harleqwin said...

Baby, WELCOME BACK!

I am SOOO very glad that you are healthy, safe and ALIVE. Your last post was NOT a good one to leave long time readers/lurkers with...

My advice is for you to forget Derek. Move on oh beautiful Girl!

Anonymous said...

Just discovered your blog today....by the typical bizarre web connects....sometimes the unforeseen turn in the road does pay dividends. The dividend here is reading with considerable enjoyment many of your postings going back to 2008.

You have a very entertaining writing style..........nicely done!!

Oh..ya.....do get back in the game!!

Anonymous said...

CJ, So glad you're back online posting...always ENTERTAINING! You seem like a strong smart woman who just needs a break to make it all worthwhile. Sometimes you have to open your eyes a little wider as to what is right around you for an answer. If you still don;t see it, THEN it is time to look somewhere else!

Anonymous said...

A story where you've used a handjob to get your way.

Hmm, I'm into ball-busting. So any ball-busting massage stories for us?

Anonymous said...

glad your back!
I really enjoy reading your blog, iv been reading it for years now!
"having her keep a schedule is like herding cats"


...herding cats....LOLz