Now I've stated quite clearly how I feel about infidelity, and I don't know if there's anything more I can say on the subject. Yes, I believe that what I do is not cheating on my significant other. But I do consider it cheating if he saw an erotic masseuse. I don't consider that hypocritical, because it's my definition and it works for me. And what works for me is my own business, and probably doesn't work for most people. I never said it would.
And for those of you who are 100% positive on how the world works and how I should be defined, you can go fuck yourselves.
Let's face it, to do what I do for a living you have to a have a slightly twisted take on what is "normal." And when you think about it, it's really no different than what the rest of us do with our lives. For example, one of my best friends is a nurse and what's "normal" for her is for people to die. I don't know about you guys, but when I think about it - it's totally fucked up that a dead body can be a normal part of your work day.
On the flip side of that, she thinks that taking off your clothes and giving a total stranger a handjob is fucked up. Go figure. What she considers insane, I call my 2 o'clock. And the same thing goes for everyone out there reading this. If you worked in McDonald's, your "normality" would revolve around fried kangaroo meat and shit stained bathrooms.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that we all need to keep an open mind around here. My purpose in telling you people all about the wackiness in my life is just to entertain and educate. I give men massages followed by a happy ending, and each week I write about how I delivered my latest one. And that's pretty much it. So I'm still kinda surprised when someone out there gets shocked by anything I have to say.
In other words, if you don't like stories with a happy ending, you're in the wrong place. And that's all I have to say on that. I promise to get back to some stories next time. In fact, I have something funny to say about my nurse friend.
CJ
39 comments:
I love it! I was waiting for you to finally tell some people to fuck off. You have far more patience than me.
I have an Aunt who changes the soiled diapers of Alzheimer's patients as part of her "normal" working in a nursing home. Now how is that more shocking than the hand jobs I give daily?
Glad you're not taking it too personally -- it's all about perspective and people will always find someone else to blame but themselves. Keep on blogging, it is one of the more interesting things I read.
Good for you, CJ.
I worked as an escort some years ago. I provided a service, didn't get emotionally involved, and didn't judge. What are you supposed to do? And honestly, men who aren't monogamous are going to find other women regardless. Maybe the man is putting a relationship at risk or maybe not... it's his choice. If I worked at McDonald's, I couldn't very well refuse to serve burgers to the morbidly obese.
Bottom line for me is this: I read your blog because I find it interesting. I enjoy your stories and getting your perspective on things. I quit reading the comments a long time ago. It's a shame that a few self-righteous people can be such a downer. I have to hand it to you for not requiring a blogger account and moderation for comments. If only those judgmental pricks were half as tolerant and showed as much class.
And it's back to lurksville for the Tantra Flower. Looking forward to the next post.
P.S. I did meet who has turned out to be a wonderful internet friend via your comments a couple of years ago. I've been meaning to say thanks for that. Thanks! XO
All lovers are liars. That’s half the fun keeping it fresh, trying to stay open, honest, true; deciding what to share or hold back and when. My lady has seen chiros and ear waxers and acupuncture folk when we are not on the same page…and she hugs and holds her cats a lot more. I feel cheated on during these times; but challenged, too….to win back that top spot. We got in a big fight over a happy ending discussion months back; the cheating issue. She later calmed down, sent me a kind note and a $100 bill for an unspoken reason. I don’t plan to book one any time soon but I feel now I have permission. And a $100 worth of trust stowed in an envelope. I’d tell her though, maybe not before but after. And (never had one) the next time I think I’d take her to watch…or have an outcall in our living room and invite her to serve tea during the session. Hey, what marriage doesn’t need the boredom stirred a bit? I’m still w/ CJ that the massage part should be the dog and not the tail that’s waging here. It is all about touch and intimacy for me…and the connection between people.
CJ- during the hardest time of my life, I found this site. I just wanted to say that although I don't agree with the profession. I do totally get some people choose to do this work and are very happy with that. That being said, this is an interesting blog but at the same time a horribly painful one because of my situation. Words can't describe the pain in reading your stories and pretty much feeling like it my husband specifically you're talking about. Now many will say, well stop reading dumb-ass. Which I will bc the pain as become a focus point in my. I must get back to the old me. This site allowed me to understand through the vast
array of comments that men cheat. The men that cheat are assholes and selfish. But happy men cheat too.
Unless you're in the situation yourself, you cant imagine the intense feelings and emotions you go through. I know this topic got outta hand and everyone had something to say. Some nice and some not. So thanks for being brave enough to face us all with some a topic that will bring some heat. I bet you wish you had a secret hand shake.. Wives not allowed sign! Lol. Youre right it's your life, do what
you want. Were not supposed to judge each other. Only one can and it's none of us on this site.
I wanted to make sure it was known from day one, my first post I stated it's not the masseuse fault. It's just not logical. My questions were solely a way for me to figure out something I wasn't familiar with. I used this site as a way to ask honest open questions I'd be to embarrassed to ask someone I knew. That's all.. Thanks and good luck with
where ever your life takes you.
Wife
You too Melissa Blade. You were very kind to me. I appreciate your empathy, you're very kind. Thanks.
Wife
I've been reading this for a while- and it really just sounds like denial. You hit rock bottom, switch careers. You'll land on your feet. There will always be guys needing your services if it fails. Just saying.
CJ, I am so incredibly hot for you right now it's sick. Not because you are attractive, or an erotic masseuse; but because you are funny in ways that are debilitating to me. A woman with a keen voice and a sly wit are the sexiest things in the world to read. You make my day, every time I read you and laugh.
I am incredibly happy that you have chosen to continue writing, and I wish you well every day.
EL
I always start my day with a smile when I click on your blog and find that you have a new post.
Mike
Word, keep on wankin'.
Oh, the eagles can eat shit.
love ya!
To "Wife",
People cheat (men and women). I am sorry about your situation, certainly not a unique situation but one that doesn't deserve of apathetic responses.
Either they cheat on their spouse or they cheat themself out of a "desire" or in some cases a need for emotional or physical connection.
It's not their partner's fault for them wanting to cheat, one could be married to a "perfect" woman and still the need for variety.
I hope you have better days and move on.
CJ,
Your Eagles are horrible this year, maybe it's time for Reid to go.
Along with PostSecret this is one of the more interesting site.
Im a woman and I want a massage from you with a HE
I was wondering when you were FINALLY going to tell everyone to go fuck themselves. If you don't agree with CJ and think happy endings are wrong, why are you so interested in reading?
To all the wives out there: try being CJ for one day. When you realize that hundreds of men are telling you how beautiful you are, and throwing loads of cash your way, your confidence really goes up, and then you realize how many "fish in the sea" there are, and you suddenly don't care about that cheating scumbag who lives in your house.
And then you meet a man who actually deserves you.
I always thought it was pretty cool that you left the comments open, but it must get really tiresome after a while.
If people you didn't know kept going in your house to tell you what a bad person you are, you'd lock the door. Not because they're right and you want to silence them, or because your poor sensitive little heart can't take criticism, but because it's YOUR FUCKING HOUSE and they have no business taking their hatred there in the first place.
So, I'm just saying, if you wanted to moderate comments and leave the bullshit out, I think we'd all still respect you a lot anyway.
That's unless you find it funny. If you do, then enjoy =)
Keep up the good work.
I'm with you 100%! You have every right to tell everyone to kiss your ass if they don't agree with your opinions. They should just support your right to voice them if you choose to.
I have enjoyed ladies in your profession and neither consider them to be prostitutes nor think I am cheating because both parties have no emotional involvement. I would like to believe if my wife was involved in receiving manual stimulation from a male, that I would apply the same logical reasoning. Not sure I could, just want to believe I would.
I look forward to reading your entries. You are very insightful, entertaining, and irreverent. We could use somebody like you in our area. You would make a mint!!
"Who Dat say dey gonna beat dem Saints!!!!"
CJ.
Make no apologies to anyone who doesn't know you or what it takes to do what you do. I think you're brave for sharing your life with is and I find your posts to be entertaining and thought provoking. Thank you for sharing. You go girl
LOL at the moron who said he's attracted to CJ- who has zero clue what she looks like.
Another laugh to the moron who said thought provoking.
I love reading your blog and your honesty when it comes to approaching sensitive topics. Hope everything works out for you soon.
so when will we get another story about a happyending
Honestly, I don't get it. C'mon ladies, put the blame where it belongs, on your husband/boyfriend.
It's like their saying; 'My husband is like a little child. I can't trust him, but I shouldn't expect to because I accept that he can't keep it in his pants and remain faithful. Therefore, I'm going to blame the escorts, strippers, and masseuses for making these temptations available to him. Clear case of denial on the wife/girlfriends part.
And let's face it; many people get married to make their parents, friends, and society happy. They need to show the world that "Hey, I'm normal too." So they're stuck in these 'traditional' situations they don't want to be in, get frustrated, and cheat.
Love your stories CJ. Please keep em coming! (pun intended).
cool story bro
please give a link to your blog so I can read more of them
So I sold drugs for years, sold thousands of stolen items, robbed a few liquor stores, and may have even killed a person or 2 along the way...but it's all good, because I was living by my definition of normal.
Way to own your actions CJ! It's much easier to justify what you do by denial than it is to man up and try to live an honest life and be a person who contributes positively to society.
I haven't read this site in a couple of years and spend a few hours today reading them all. Wish you all the best.
Also, you do have a quasi-celebrity status that you're leaving untapped if you are looking to make some extra $, it occurs to me that you could make quite a bit to the readers that feel like they know you at this point - that's probably a creeper move to say so, but it's true; you're still more anonymous than any with the real pics on the body rubs section of backpage.
does your nurse friend do massages?
Hey CJ, I completely agree with this post. If one person's "normal day" works for them, then more power to them. I'm glad you're keeping your chin up. I look forward to the next post!
To Wife,
I understand the pain you are experiencing. It is so horrible. I hope your husband gets sex addiction counseling.
I get that you would consider it cheating if your boyfriend went to a happy ending massage parlour because it would be him receiving pleasure which is different to what you do...But - would you be ok with it if his job was to massage women and bring them to orgasm with his hands and body? If he came home and you know he'd been touching tens of women that day before he came home and touched you? Maybe you'd be fine with it but I think that's more the question when it comes to whether you think what you're doing it 'cheating' in some way or not, as opposed to him being the user of such a service.
Enough with the infidelity and morality BS Q & A. I have some much better questions! When do we get to read about your last days at the biz? Sorry if it hurts but it sounds like a hot story.
Also, have you ever considered getting yourself off for a living? Your little teaser pic leads me to believe A LOT of dudes would be eager to pay a monthly fee you watch you prance around naked and play with yourself. I'm sure Techno nerd could set you up!
I just happened across your blog today. I have to tell you I read almost every one back to 2007. You are a very interesting lady. I love your takes on life and your blunt attitude. I can't wait for your next post!
Can you just tell a fucking story about your work and leave the dubious morality out of it for a little while? Enough of the hand wringing - you have been doing this for how many years now? Shit or get off the pot, please
pools closed because of aids. at this point its the tired flopping about of someone who's going to lose whatever ths counts as. it sure ain't credibility.
i love the fucking BS about how its ok if you thought so but cheating for someone else or whatever fuck you were trying to say. honestly, its moments like this one should say, "i'm self centered enough to not want my boyfriend to do the shit i do because i know its morally ambigious at the least."
whatever. i hope you love him hard so that when he leaves you for being what you are you cry like a pathetic waste.
be what you will be, but be it honestly.
Hello I m a fan of shemales and belive me your post is truly a good one!
Nice post. Liked what you have to say and more or less agree with you.
Wow!!! I have to say you are one wonderful woman..i love how your giving us the view from the womans point of view..me being a male have always wondered what goes through the mind of a woman who gives such services..i myself have gone to an erotic massage parlor my fair share of times and to be honest I go because its thrilling..i try to show the women that I trully am interested in what we talk about and show themas much respect as humanly possible... Its actually gotten to the point where I will visit and bring them a gift of flowers or chocolates not to improve my chances of "scoring" but to bring a smile to them just as they do to me...so again thank you very much
CJ,
What a bunch of bullshit! I enjoy reading your column and think you have a great sense of humor. I don't judge you because basically we all have to live our own lives.
That said, are you kidding me? You get on your hands and knees while some guy shoots cum on your face and hair and this is not cheating??? Who's foolin who CJ?
Like I said, I don't judge you for your job, but I will judge you for livin a lie. Letting some stranger come on your face is no less cheating than some stranger coming in a condom.
O my gawd. Pathetic. Chocolates n flowers for the massager. They are laughing their asses off at you. Dave your money honey. Pay the hooker for your service DVD get out. Save the sweetness for your girl.
@ Lelouch, thanks for mentioning PostSecret! What an interesting site to find out about.
And, wow, BrickHenry's back....oddly, I feel kinda sentimental to read his horribleness to CJ. It's like he was one of the first haters and he has more of a right to complain than all these boring Anon's. Silly, I know....
I read your blog because I find it interesting. I enjoy your stories and getting your perspective on things.
thanks for that great info
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