Taboo

When you're trying to find something interesting about work to talk about, that's when you realize all the stuff you're NOT allowed to talk about. I've always made it a point to never use real names (that's why there's probably a dozen stories in this blog about a guy named "Mike"). I've slipped up a few times, but it's not like anyone will ever figure it out.

Hopefully.

CJ Who?
Now when it comes to interesting customer stories, I have to be careful about who I write about and when. For example, I make it a point NOT to mention readers who have actually done their homework and found The Business. And yes - there have been a lucky few. You have no idea how freaky it is to have a guy on the table asking me if I've ever heard of "CJ" or "happyendingz." So the last thing I can do is write "another guy found me yesterday" without him figuring it out. And those guys can NEVER be a freak of the week, which can be damn frustrating, let me tell ya.

The Names Have Been Changed To Protect The Guilty
Another thing I can't mention are the actual names of local businesses. I mean if they're in the paper as getting shut down, I can't stop anyone from finding it on the internet. But real names I'll never post here. When I first started this blog, I used to make the mistake of recommending local parlors to guys who asked me by email. Then it quickly dawned on me that if I mention the competition, then by the process of elimination they could eventually find me. So now my standard reply to requests for appointments or recommendations is "sorry, but I can't for obvious reasons..."

TMI
Then there's things I just shouldn't talk about - or at least not in too much detail. For example, I've been keeping you guys up to date on how we've been protecting ourselves here at The Business during the current crackdown. I've mentioned a few things we've done, like cut off newbies for a few months, but then there are specific techniques that we use that I won't mention here - just in case. So before any of you assume that we're all sucking off state troopers to stay in business - think again. That technique obviously didn't work for the other parlors that got raided recently. However, if any of my girls are out there reading this (Red I'm talking to you), I'll gladly give you an update on the latest intel.

Regulars
Lastly, there are my beloved Regulars. I've made it a point not to do profiles on my regular customers because over time I'd probably end up revealing enough info for these guys to recognize themselves on the internet. That's why I usually do individual stories, with a new fake name attached each time. The last thing I need is a Regular to realize "Hey - I'm Freddie the Foot Fetish Fan!"

A Guy Walks Into A Bar...
And did you ever notice how I start my stories with "A guy came in yesterday..."? It's always "yesterday" or "last week" or whatever. So if anyone out there thought I was talking about you personally because you just happened to be in a massage parlor yesterday wearing women's underwear asking to be spanked - I apologize. Maybe it really was you yesterday. Maybe not. But never ever assume that you're the only guy on the planet who practices your particular little kink. Hell, I still meet foot fetish guys who are shocked to hear that I have a standard price for that.

Think you're the only guy who ever dressed up as Little Bo Peep, and asked me to baaaa like a sheep? There's a reason why they sell her costume in XXL in adult toy stores.

Now if I ever slip up and mention the butterfly tattoo on your left ass cheek........ oh shit!

CJ