Thursday, November 18, 2010

Crackdown Update

Well it's been 2 weeks since the election and 3 weeks since the last raid. And as I suspected, there's been nothing since then. Now that the dust has settled and local political jobs are safe for another couple years, the cops will go back to handing out parking tickets and eating donuts.

I hope.

Anyway, I checked in with my girlfriend who runs her business out in the burbs. Those raids 3 weeks ago scared the shit out of all her girls and it took a while to get everyone comfortable enough to come back to work. Luckily they seem to have escaped any unwanted attention. However, she now tells me that a local town is drafting a new ordinance targeting massage parlors.

It works like this... Basically it's requiring all the girls to be licensed and prove citizenship (which is just a rehashing of state law anyway). This citizenship bit obviously targets the AMPs. It also limits the hours of operation so any unlucky guys who absolutely positively need a massage at 1am will have to cross the border to Jersey (which I guess is fine if you don't mind your masseuse having 6 inch nails and being the color orange).

Normally, rules like this wouldn't affect places like The Business since our hiring paperwork is clean and our hours are not suspicious. BUT this new law will require the town to personally inspect each parlor for compliance. THAT is the clincher. It's really a golden key to get you unlimited access to any suspected parlor. I'll bet you money right now that most of the parlors around here wouldn't even be able to pass the cleanliness inspection, let alone the citizenship tests.

Needless to say, my friend is worried that these new laws will work their way to neighboring towns, including hers. I'm not too worried about it since this is probably just some bullshit publicity stunt leftover from the election. The town authorities probably had to write the law to fulfill all those campaign promises they made a month ago. At least with a police raid all you have to do is waste the cops time for a couple of days until you get your name in the papers for being tough on crime.

I had a similar discussion with a customer recently. He said my theory on crackdowns before an election was BS because there was a nationwide bust of a gang-run prostitution ring just AFTER the election. So why would the feds wait a few days to do their raids if it's so good for politics?

That's because if you're a local mayor/police chief/councilman/etc., the LAST thing you want is the feds stepping in and basically embarassing your local cops by doing their job for them. An FBI raid just shows that you have no control over crime in your town.

And how do I know all this you ask? Well, you gotta talk about something when your customer is a lawyer or a cop (or even a local politician!).



Anonymous said...

What a frickin' mess!

Thrush said...

Good to hear you're still in business.

Anonymous said...

will you take a trip to Canada? Leave Derek there.

Niko said...

Your blog is one of the most outstanding and original ideas I have ever seen. In all seriousness, I'm torn in both directions in what I think about it all--but I definitely will be remaining tuned in from here on out.

Some moments make me say, "OMG!" and other moments excited and disgusted too (LOL). As a long time blogger myself, I am always happy to run across fresh and original stuff in a day and age where everyone puts the same crap on display.


Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday

Anonymous said...

Our town (sounds quaint, doesn't it?) tried to pass an ordinance designed to prevent an AMP invasion. (That's all we have around here, unless you want full service.) The loudest objections to the ordinance came from the legit places, which is really all we have in our town, haha. They couldn't draft it in a way that it didn't have "unintended consequences" that would reach the legit boys and girls who think that muscular manipulation should be happy enough. They came to City Hall at the hearing and objected, in a mellow yet firm tone (you want medium?). The ordinance didn't pass. They got their happy ending. And the council looked good, actually, by trying to address the "problem" but ultimately serving the needs of legit biz. An odd logic, because the risk of invasion still exists, but it carried the day.

Hopefully your local authorities will have the same issue.

-- The Councilman

Nicky G said...

Pa. man shot in 'massage gone wrong'

Hopefully no one you know CJ - on either side of the story.

ALLENTOWN, Pa. - November 22, 2010 (WPVI) -- An Allentown man is recovering from a gunshot wound after being shot by a woman who was allegedly there to give him a massage.

The shooting happened inside the apartment of 30-year-old Owen Wilson on Saturday afternoon.

According to police, 19-year-old Sunshine Daubert came to his apartment to give him a massage, but police say she is no masseuse.

Instead, investigators believe Daubert was trying to rob Wilson. In fact, police say Wilson was face-down, expecting the massage, when he was shot.

Rest of Story @

Thorn of UG said...

Yeah, they hit all those places on the 309 corridor. All AMP if I am not mistaken. Took a couple of customers in as well. Highly unusual, that. Prior to that I had never heard of customers being arrested.

Wishing well...