Thursday, July 24, 2008


I wasn’t feeling well this morning, so I cancelled an appointment with a Regular. I don’t normally do that, but this guy can be soooooooo annoying and I wasn’t in the mood. This guy’s married, which is fine by me, BUT every single time he comes in the conversation usually turns to his personal life and how unhappy he is with his wife, kids, job, mortgage, paycheck, neighbors, politics, weather, economy, blah, blah, blah. Hey – I coulda used the hundred bucks, but he hates EVERYTHING about EVERYTHING.

Listen buddy, you came in here to relax. I am not your therapist, chiropractor, teacher, counselor, doctor, financial advisor, coach, priest, mentor or psychiatrist. I am also not your carpenter, plumber, mechanic or electrician (yes – he once asked me if I knew anything about electrical wiring). And besides – do you really want investment advice from your masseuse?

Plus, Audrey got on me today about my outfit. Apparently she didn’t think my double tank top was “appropriate” for work. It’s 90 degrees and 100% humid outside bitch! Maybe you’d know what it was like outside if you ever bothered to leave this cave and get a life. So did I mention to her that she’s been wearing the EXACT same nasty-ass shirt for 3 days in a row now? Nooooooooo… Because I’m not like that.

And customers have told me that every time they get her in session, she’s always wearing that ugly, black lace bra with the hole in the left cup. So why don’t you look in the mirror first before you start critiquing MY outfit?!

Oh Gawd. I think I’m PMSing.



Anonymous said...

Outfit wasn't appropriate for work??? WTF? Was she saying too much clothing or too litle? If I'm reading this blog correctly, "work" is taking off most of your clothes and jerking dudes off - you're supposed to dress like an IBM salesmen for that job?

ez cheese said...

No I think your boss is a dumbass

cj said...

Dear anon...


ContinuousButPlural said...

Jealous much?

Anonymous said...

Aren't you the one insisting on calling yourself a "therapist"?! And complaining that the "quiet ones" are creepy?!
Does every customer have to be exactly the way YOU want? I know he's probably annoying, but you're the one ending up sounding like a bitch, CJ. Just sayin'.