Tuesday, August 12, 2008


I have so much work stuff I want to talk about, but I have to tell you about my weekend first.

Remember how I was all bitchy and depressed when I realized I was missing my annual romantic getaway to the beach? Well, I was complaining about it last week to (of all people) Audrey. And even though she’s a lying, stealing and conniving skank, she actually felt bad enough to take me to Atlantic City for the weekend!

I was supposed to work Saturday and Sunday, so she just offered my shifts to the new girl (who was more than happy for the chance to make some extra $$) and off we went. It turns out that Audrey had all these comps at Caesar’s that she’s been sitting on, so hotel room and food we’re practically free! Friday morning I packed a couple of my sluttiest dresses, a pair of shorts, T-shirts, and a bikini and we jumped in her car and made it to AC by noon.

And let me tell ya – even though I talk a lot of shit about her, we had the best time! We started off our weekend with a couple drinks at the bar (which by the way were the ONLY drinks I had to pay for all weekend!) then we hit the boardwalk for some site seeing and sun. We went window shopping in that new pier/mall thing next to Caesars. We had funnel cake on the boardwalk. We even went on a ride with one of those rick-shaw things. It was just soooooo nice to spend a few days giving my arm a rest.

Now I prefer the beaches of Maryland for vacation, but this was the one and only time I had fun at the Jersey shore. They have this bar that’s actually across the boardwalk and located on the beach. We practically lived there for 2 days. I met a bunch of really cute guys, but there was this 1 in particular who was really hot and kept buying drinks for me and Audrey. She said he kinda looked like Nick Lachey, only hotter. We drank and danced and basically teased the shit out of everyone. Audrey’s only rule for the weekend was no guys in the room since this was supposed to be about me just having a good time and forgetting about my singleness. So needless to say, poor CJ went home with Audrey every evening.

Funny thing about casino bars in AC - apparently the male clientele sometimes have trouble distinguishing between the party girls and the working girls. I figured this out after 2 guys made really really bad attempts to ask me "how much?" without actually saying "how much?" So I asked the bartender if the place was full of assholes or was it just me. He explained that the hookers come out in force on the weekends, but it would take a really drunken, overly optimistic guy to confuse me with one.

Now when we weren’t milking guys for drinks, or dirty dancing in front of the DJ, we were hitting the slots (I won $25 – go me!), pigging out at a buffet, or shopping. Saturday and Sunday mornings were spent on the beach nursing our hangovers and working on our tans.

When we left for home on Sunday evening (never leave AC on a Sunday afternoon – the expressway is a parking lot), I had 5 phone numbers scribbled on napkins and business cards, and Audrey had 11. It was on the Atlantic City Expressway that Audrey introduced me to a ritual of hers. Whenever she heads home from a weekend in AC, she opens up all the windows in the car and cranks the radio really loud. Then sometime after the first toll booth, she takes the phone numbers she has collected and throws them all out the window. She called this her “purging ritual” and said it was necessary to keep AC as her special getaway and not let it affect her home life.

So I took a deep breath and emptied my fake Prada purse of all those little memories of the guys that coulda been – even Nick Lachey guy. I have to admit, it felt kinda good to know that I still got it!



Anonymous said...

I'm glad to hear you had such a nice getaway to AC. The part about being mistaken for hookers was funny. I'll be looking forward to hearing the latest things going on at work.


ez cheese said...

"She said he kinda looked like Nick Lachey,"

I hope less douchy, though

The Girl in the Mirror said...

Being mistaken for hookers in the bar of a hotel reminds me of a (goes without saying) very cheesy episode of Golden Girls.

I'm sure you guys are way hotter.

cj said...

Dear Girl,

OMG - I completely forgot about that episode!!!! That's a f-ing riot! I see myself as Blanche now...


Lilly said...

I get your friends point. At first I didn't I was like "noooo!!!! the hotness went buhbyes!!!" But people you meet on vacation are vacation hookups. So very very rarely can they be more.

You end up disappointed, it's like everyone is a different person there. And if the guys is alone, he's always always "single"....till he gets home.

Anonymous said...

Fake Prada purse? I thought it was real since the SD who gave it to you got a special reward?