Congratulations to Cindy who had her baby last night!!!!! It was a bit earlier than expected, but mom and baby are doing good. Baby X was born at 11pm and weighs 7 lbs. 3 ounces. I was there, along with the Baby Daddy. I don't know him all too well, but he seems to be a good guy.
Funny story - I've been fighting the Swine Flu for a couple weeks now, and I think I'm losing. Anyway, last night after Cindy went into labor, I started to feel sick, so I ended up disappearing into the bathroom throughout much of the labor pains. Poor Mr. Baby Daddy had to deal with most of it.
So finally, I threw up my dinner and then felt better. By the time I had cleaned myself up and got back to the delivery room, Baby X was just starting to appear. I was there for the whole thing and got to see the birth, the cord, the afterbirth, I mean everything.
Afterwards, I spent a lot of time doing the obligatory phone calls, e-mails and text messages to all their friends and family. I figured it was the least I could do so they could relax and spend time with the baby. Besides, when it comes to text messages and e-mail, they're both pretty clueless.
Speaking of clueless, have you ever seen a woman with implants try to breast feed a baby? It's scary. You keep worrying that poor baby's gonna suffocate, or get crushed by a flying boob. Those things are swollen so badly that they look even more fake than before.
After things settled down, I headed home early this morning. So now I'm dead tired, and I'm working night shift. I hope I make some money tonight so I can buy that kid some presents. I don't know what kind of a mom Cindy will make, but he's damn fortunate that he has Auntie CJ to look after him. All my nieces and nephews LOVE me.
So all of tonights happy endings are dedicated to Baby X. And if any of Cindy's Regulars show up tonight, I hope I can hit them up for donations. And if any of you out there are feeling generous, please send those Babies-R-Us gift cards!!