Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Freak of the Week - The Gynocologist

I've noticed an interesting trend lately. For the last year, Audrey has been getting more and more appointments while the rest of us have been getting less and less. Well, over the last month or so that has been changing. What I think is that customers were getting lured away since she cuts her prices. But now I think that guys are just getting sick of her bad attitude and are willing to spend the REGULAR price for a better quality session. Either that or the economy is getting better!

It's nice that we're finally starting to see some old Regulars come back. But every once in a while I'll get a guy who Audrey can keep for all I care. Last night's customer is a perfect example.

Let's call this guy Daniel. This guy has always been an Audrey Regular until yesterday. He obviously didn't want to see her because he knows her schedule. I didn't say anything when I recognized him, but I did smile to myself knowing that she has another defector.

He booked an hour then asked for a mutual. "Mr. Moneybags" I thought. Usually her old customers take 30 minutes, then demand a topless for half price. This was refreshing.

Daniel insisted on massaging me first. When I got on the table, he told me to lay on my back which I thought was odd since you normally massage the back first, then end with the breasts. He wanted to depart from proper massage etiquette and go straight for The Girls, which is kinda like having dessert before the appetizer. But it was his dime, so I didn't complain.

He moves over to the table and starts kneading my left breast with his fingertips. "I'm going to give you a breast exam." he says matter-of-factly. "I'm looking for any lumps." He's not smiling when he says this, instead he's dead serious. Now I'm used to guys making small talk during session, but it's usually along the lines of "So you like working here?" It's really funny the kinds of things guys will say when they've got 2 handfuls of breast, and they want to look like they do this all the time.

"Let me know if you find any Dan" I manage to say. At least he's not squeezing them or trying to pinch my nipples.

"Call me Doctor Johnson."

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... so that's his kink. He thinks he's a doctor. I can play along. I told him that I recently saw my gynecologist and that really got Daniel going. He must have asked me 20 questions about it - and I mean the real technical kind too. Apparently Dan is REALLY into gynecology, which is odd considering he's a salesman for roofing supplies.

While I'm answering his questions, I eventually mentioned a speculum. Let me tell ya - this was Daniels happy button. He had me go into detail about the speculum, meanwhile I noticed that he started playing with himself. I tried to sneak a peek, but he kept it hidden below the edge of the massage table. So now he was rubbing my right breast with his right hand, and taking care of business with his left while I just lied there talking about my last gyno visit. I was only hoping that he wouldn't make a mess on the side of my table.

Daniel was a good boy and didn't stain anything in the room. He got bored with The Girls and then told me to switch spots (what a rip - 20 minutes of getting my breasts poked and I don't even get a back rub!). Unlike Dan, I follow proper massage etiquette and start on his shoulders, then work my way down his back.

But he still wants to talk about that damn speculum. "I have one you know. I like to use it on my girlfriend." I tried to change the subject, but he just presses on. "Yeah... I like to get her nice and wide open. Then I look inside her with a flashlight." At this point I'm starting to see where this is going. "I'd like to bring it in next time. Would you mind?"

Phew! At least he doesn't have it with him. But now I'm thinking that if he's one of Audrey's Regulars, then you know he's been using it on her. Yuck. I pretend like I might be into it just so he'll give up more info. As he talks, I learn he doesn't have a girlfriend (what a surprise), but instead does this with "a special lady" he sees regularly. If by "special" he means slow, then he must mean Audrey.

Finally we get to the end part he acts a little confused when I start to rub the oil on his dick. When I ask him what's wrong he says "Uhhhh... I haven't gone down on you yet."

I want to scream "Ewww Ewww Ewww Ewwww!" but instead I give him a polite "I'm sorry... but I don't offer that as an option." He's obviously used to doing this with Audrey so I hope he takes a hint and doesn't ask for me again. Daniel is quiet during the hand release (fine by me), but he actually thanks me afterwards and tips me an extra $20.

That was nice of him, but I really really really don't want him to show up next time with his own speculum and flashlight, expecting me to call him Doctor.



Advizor said...

I think your "Freak of the Week" title has never been more appropriate. It's one thing to "play doctor" but when it extends to buying equipment and learning the lingo, I'd have to say "NO NO NO".

It would be interesting to meet his girlfriend though. Why would he go to a professional if she's will to endure the flashlight and "exam" on a regular basis. She might be Freak of the Week #2.

Great story.....

Anonymous said...

I guess, to Audrey, mutual doesn't mean mutual massage, but mutual oral. I'll bet he's played doctor with her, using his speculum too.


shannon said...

I bet he shows up next time wearing a white coat while carrying a speculum, a pap smear kit, and newly purchased stirrups in his 'doctor bag'.

Anonymous said...

Do a double with audrey,see what she does.

greenhornet said...

I say you make out like a bandit next time. Like an amusement park, sell flashlights for 50 bucks, swabs for 100, and a variety of colored speculums for 200 a pop. Oh and don't forget the tasty churros!

Anonymous said...

Look at the upside. He was playing doctor, wanted to go down on you, and thought about bringing a speculum. Now, imagine instead that he wanted to play cave spelunker . . .

cj said...

Ya know what guys, now that I think about it, I'll bet money the "special lady" is Audrey. I mean why would he bring up his kink during our first session if he wasn't already doing it in her sessions?

And what about that flashlight? LOL


mommasboy said...

"(what a rip - 20 minutes of getting my breasts poked and I don't even get a back rub!)."

Uh, he pays _you_, remember?