Tuesday, June 2, 2009

The Triumphant, Magnificent, Much Anticipated Return of Sugar Daddy Pete

Actually, we had a couple returns this week. First, I would like to share the good news that Cindy is back with us. the new mommy is doing well, and now she's back to work. She still has a few baby pounds on her, but considering how skinny she was in the first place, I think it looks good on her. And let me tell ya - those implants look ridiculously big right now. It might help if she bought some new bras.

And second, I finally heard something from Sugar Daddy Pete after 6 long months. Yes - it's been that long. To refresh your memory, he was the incredibly generous gentleman who wooed me at the beginning of the year, and even got me to go out on a date and see his new vacation home out in the country.

He sent me a text message.

Six months after a night of expensive wine, luxury cars, and a small, but lavishly appointed McMansion, Pete sent me a fucking text message.

"how you doin girl? been thinking about you. will see you soon. xo"

Now I don't want to be accused of over-analyzing anything, or just plain stalking, but let's break down the meaning of this little message, shall we?

"how you doin girl?"
Notice the casual spelling. I would assume he's trying to sound extra casual considering I haven't heard a peep outta him in 6 months. And "girl" might indicate that he's forgotten my name - assuming he saved my number on his cell phone under something innocent like "A1 Plumbing."

"been thinking about you."
This is just another way of saying "Can't afford to see you right now." That's probably due to the state of the economy, combined with a nosey wife who's keeping careful track of all the family finances.

Now look at the words "thinking about." Work with me here... what if we replace the word "thinking" with the word "seeing" - it might suggest that he's been seeing our billboard on the highway. Which means that he's been driving back and forth between his home in the city and the vacation place in the country. It would be nearing completion right now, assuming he didn't lose ALL his money in the stock market.

"will see you soon."

Well obviously he's trying to grease the wheels for when he does finally come back. This means he has something planned. He probably got his disposable income back or is about to. Combine that with some scheduled trips to the vacation house, and that means I get an SD in time for summer!

"xo"
This is a reminder that he's still interested as a Sugar Daddy. I hope anyway. We'll see. Fingers crossed.

Once again, I'm acting like a teenaged girl when I talk about him. UGH. What is wrong with me?

Anyway, I loved the suggestions for the name of the new business. So far the favorites are:

Shake N Bake
Hand N Tans
Where The Sun Don't Shine
Tantastic Endings


and special consideration to Cum and Tan for the "Best Name That Can't Be Used In A Million Years" category.

I will pick a winner next time!

CJ

5 comments:

Ed Bass said...

I kinda like "Handy Tan"

Anonymous said...

"I'm acting like a teenaged girl when I talk about him"


I had to use your quote above to support my case. As I said previously when Pete was being talked about, I think you are attracted to the guy even though you try to keep the "strictly business" attitude most customers get. You may not admit it, but it seems obvious to me from your writing, that you're sweet on Pete.

I think it's cool, and am hoping that one day we'll be reading about you hooking up with him. I like the thought of it better than you hooking up with someone from match.com, especially if you can do it and keep reaping the benefits of having him as a sugar daddy.

AJ

Anonymous said...

Rays & Sprays
UVs & YMMV
Burnin' Sperm

Out of a Bottle said...

Just looking at Anon's comment above. Love Rays & Sprays, but what is YMMV?

dan said...

Your Mileage May Vary ... a common phrase on massage review (and other) boards. Meaning "this experience I had with a particular therapist may not be yours".