Tuesday, February 3, 2009

I Give Great First Date

Reflex, Kenny, HOP, and Sir - thank you for being honest! No offense, but I think the rest of you are full of shit.

I've never dated a customer, but I know plenty of girls who have and it usually ended badly. Sooner or later the jealousy creeps in and gets the best of the guy. It usually wasn't deserved, but in some cases it was (what? - she didn't explain that she was full service with everyone BUT you?). Some guys hang in there, but they're almost always the total loser type - no job, no car, in a band, etc. And the funniest thing about them is that when you ask "So... how did you two meet?" they always say something stupid like "... at Borders." Yeah - like you know how to read.

Funny thing is that there never seems to be any problems with the married girls. Husbands don't seem to mind. I think it has something to do with the giant wad of cash the wife brings home at the end of the day. Money may not buy you love, but it can definitely get you to overlook that cock smell on the hands.

Even though I've never dated a customer, I have gone out with a few with mixed results. The most common problem was the guys who just assumed I was easy. Look buddy - you PAID for that handjob at work. That pasta dinner ain't getting you jack squat.

But the worst problem with seeing a guy outside of work is the "misunderstanding" that this was supposed to be a date, and NOT full-service outcall. I had a couple of these after I first got in The Business. Let me tell ya - there's nothing more awkward on a first date when he begins the conversation with "I got us a room at the Motel 6" as opposed to the more subtle "What would you like to drink?"

Now I'm sure that the rest of you guys were sincere when you said that you'd probably date someone like me in spite of what I do, and in some cases because of what I do. When you put it that way, I guess you could say that I give great first date. I could amaze you with all sorts of bizarre stories about work - and with a tight enough shirt I could keep your eyes from wandering the room. But after a few stories that end with "... then I wiped his cum off me" you guys would assume that I've replaced the good night kiss with a handjob.

Another dilemma about dating a customer is that (believe it or not) I would never want to date a guy who went to massage parlors. Heck, I even have problems with guys I'm dating going to strip clubs! The thing is, once you're a Regular, you're always a Regular. Just because he's dating me and getting all the erotic massages he wants, I know he's probably still going to another Business. I once had a coworker who started dating a customer. What she didn't know is that he used to come in when she was off to get sessions from the other girls. We never said a thing either, because he was a great tipper.

So there you have it. Now you know why I just tell guys that I'm a shampooer at a Day Spa. But if any of you out there still think you could date me, thank you! I do feel flattered.



Anonymous said...

Well now...this brings up a good question for you for maybe a next post.

What if you, CJ, found the guy you want. Would you give up your job to ensure a more lasting relationship with him?

RIV said...

While I can't talk about the other gentlemen on here; my perversity is fairly well documented online.
Just like we think you're adorable not because of your looks (in which you ARE good looking), but because of what we know of what and how you write; you shouldn't paint us all with the same brush.
I still stand by my statement, but if anything, you might reject ME for a variety of reasons, particularly my hobbies.

Anonymous said...

Years ago I dated a stripper for the summer. Awesome time. I only saw her strip once and we made a rule that I couldn't go see her work. It was casual- fun actually hilarious. however it never got serious- just couldn't. I couldn't go there and she knew it. If it did - it would have been- the job or me type of thing. I was just out of college with a good professional job (engineer)you seem like an awesome girl. I think however that if you do hook up with a guy who does not know what you do- if it gets serious - you'll go down the same road, however with the twist that he's been lied to since the beginning. lastly Craig is loser- don't waste your time

Anonymous said...

CJ - Good assessment, and I fully agree. I'd certainly be good friends with someone in your line of work, I may even be willing to date them casually. But I couldn't do a serious relationship, you are right at some point I would expect that my body is the only one she touches. And like I said, I'm not a jealous guy, its just an expectation. And honestly I would *hope* that she would feel the same way about where my hands go with other females. If she didn't, well, why is she even with me?

Yes, I know there are people who are into sharing or 'open' relationships, but I don't get the feeling that that is what you are after.

And seconding the earlier question: Would you consider giving up what you do if you found the right person for you?

grub said...

i think i just might like you even more.. how sad/happy.

cj said...

Reflex and flyinfox,

Ya know, I thought about it and I honestly can't say it's an easy answer. I mean sure, if some rich Sugar Daddy decided to sweep me off my feet and make an honest woman of me - I'd gladly hang up my bottle of massage oil.

But I don't see that happening any time soon. I've been dating a long line of assholes who have mostly been kept in the dark about what I do. And none of those relationships ever got serious enough for me to "confess all" or consider going legitimate.

Now say I met a customer, went out, had a few laughs, but then we really connected... I don't know. Never really thought about it before. I guess if he were Mr. Perfect, then he wouldn't mind what I do. Remember - I feel that what I do in the Session is not a big deal and has no bearing on my personal relationships (apart from that whole web-of-lies thing). So if I don't see it as a problem, then Mr. Perfect wouldn't either.

If the guy eventually asked me to quit, then he's just 1 step from going down that road to jealousy. Then the fights start, and the accusations, and we're right back to a typical masseuse/customer relationship. Catch-22.

There - did I answer your question? No? Oh well, I don't know the answer either I guess..


Anonymous said...

Well the question from my point of view is whether or not you met someone you liked outside of work. I don't think you could ever really trust a customer, if someone was your perfect guy who was originally a sugar daddy, how could you ever feel confident that he wasn't busy being a sugar daddy to some other working girl?

If you got into a serious relationship with someone who was not an asshole outside of work, would it ever make you consider doing something new? Whether or not they ever knew about what you do for a living.

And I'm sorry that all you've dated are assholes. No one deserves that, although it seems all to common.

krist said...

I guess it comes down to what you're looking for in someone.

I mean I could date someone who did it cause I would like the stories and I am not the jealous type. But what kind of person do you want that man to be.

I mean he can't be a regular and you dont' like someone who's goes to strip clubs. Why?

and you think I might be full of shit but I dated a girl who was a stripper turned phone sex girl and I wasn't bothered by it at all, besides the landline at the time being used...

who knows. maybe the men who live in your area just fuckin' suck..

Anonymous said...

I've read all your old posts. And although your tone tends to vary quite a bit from one to another, the overall trend seems to it express some ambivalence about what you do, at least in my opinion. Given that, I don't think you can expect any guy to be completely comfortable with it.

I don't mean that as an attack or as a judgment.

Riggstad said...

I was serious, really. I may have been making a funny by stating what you do would be more of a reason to date you, but it certainly wouldn't be a reason not to date you.

Call bull shit if you will, but it's just me. I have never been the jealous or judgemental type.

Call it a blessing, call it weird, call it whatever.

Thats just me.

That being said, I am a happily married guy with no intentions of ever cheating on my wife. But if I wasn't married... :)

Anonymous said...

Ok...touche. You are probably gonna think I'm full of shit, but the times I went to the strip clubs, I was either picking someone up, meeting someone or with a big group. Matter of fact, the first time I ever set foot in one, a bunch of GIRLS from work took me (I was going through a bad break up...) I've always been uncomfortable around girls in and around the adult industry. I guess I was nervous of someone more experienced than me. I think that's why I hooked up - because they could tell I didn't belong: I never sat on perv's row, I usually played poker or pool or something so out of the norm in a strip club, and usually talked to the bartender. Nope, I'm legit in what I'm saying...I never wanted to go see them at work and they didn't want me there....I really didn't care.

C W said...

I know this is an old post, but I just found your blog and I love it. I had to weigh in on this. I have dated strippers and you are right. It alwasys starts out great. Its kind of hot to date a stripper. But, after a while I actually cared about the women/Strippers. That is when it started to bother me and it ended. In the end, everyone gets hurt.